


Conspiracy - AU April Prompts

by shabootl



Series: AU April [10]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:22:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23573821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shabootl/pseuds/shabootl
Summary: Kuroo and Yaku meet in a philosophy class.Kuroo and Yaku disagree on many things.Kuroo and Yaku butt heads all the time to point where absolutely EVERYONE has to get involved.
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Yaku Morisuke
Series: AU April [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1683811
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	Conspiracy - AU April Prompts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The amount of nerd/anime references in this will be enough to warrant my arrest. You have been warned.

DAY TEN: Conspiracy

Fandom: Haikyuu!! - College AU

Pairing: Kuroo x Yaku

* * *

“Do you understand the words that are coming out of your mouth? Because I don’t think you understand the words that are coming out of your mouth.”

“You’re wrong, Kuroo. You’re just so wrong it hurts,” Yaku says, pulling at his own hair. “I’m in _pain_ just knowing you’re wrong. I’m willing to stand here until you admit that you’re wrong.”

“Stand?” Kuroo snorts. “Funny, I could’ve sworn you were sitting.”

Yaku’s eyes narrow. “Excuse me? _What did you say?_ ”

Kuroo raises his eyebrows. “Short. I just called you short--No need to get upset; it’s just another fact of the world. Just like how when comparing consoles, Xbox One falls short of the PS4. Accept it, squirt. You’ll sleep a lot better.”

“Oh, I’m _sorry_ ,” Yaku says. He cups a hand around his ear. “I can’t hear you over my superior entertainment system.”

“Oh, wow. It’s a shame your shitty graphics aren’t clear enough for you to read my lips--”

A throat clears. 

The boys turn to see the professor of the next class to use the classroom purse their lips. “With this level of enthusiasm, you two should join the Debate Team. Now, if you aren’t taking my course, I must ask you to leave.”

Kuroo and Yaku shuffle out of the room awkwardly, both mumbling apologies to the professor whilst still glaring at each other.

The boys get too carried away with each other, and the same event happens again, this time about Macs versus PCs.

And again, this time about coke or pepsi.

And again, this time about fried or barbequed food.

Until finally, someone else has to step in. 

  
  


Quite a few someone else's.

\---

  
  
  


“I can’t believe this guy!” Kuroo throws his bag on his bed with a huff.

“Philosophy guy again?” Iwaizumi says, barely raising an eye from his textbook.

“He actually argued that _Leibniz_ was the true founder of calculus when it’s obviously, _clearly_ Newton!” Kuroo begins pacing around in a circle behind him, gesticulating wildly. “‘He thought of it first’ blah blah blah blah. How does _he_ have any proof that Leibniz _thought_ of it first? It could have been stewing in Newton’s head for decades before Leibniz even wrote anything down!”

“Uh huh.”

“And _who_ conjured the thought of it is irrelevant! Neither of them probably thought of it first, in all of human history, it would be improbable for someone to have not already, but Newton _published_ it first! Anyone knows that every thought is just a dream until it becomes _reality_. And then hear this: this guy actually brings up the Library of Alexandria as an example of whatever bullshit he was trying to say!”

Iwaizumi listens with one half-hearted ear as he continues to skim and highlight his work. Kuroo tended to rant on about this ‘Yaku’ guy for ages. Kuroo could go on for hours if Iwaizumi let him. Iwaizumi rubs his temple. The only reason Iwaizumi could deal with Kuroo’s ranting was because Oikawa was a million times worse. At least Kuroo’s rants had some level of educational tidbits in them.

“And _aliens_ . This dude honestly doesn’t believe in the _possibility_ of aliens in Area 51! ‘Just a conspiracy’ my ass. Who the hell doesn’t--”

Well, educational to a point.

Iwaizumi lets Kuroo go on for a few more minutes before turning around with a sigh.

“--and _that’s_ why Light was completely JUSTIFIED _\--_ ”

“Kuroo, when are you going to let this go?”

“What?” Kuroo stops mid-sentence, apparently yanked from his own little imaginary stage.

Iwaizumi repeats his question. “You’ve been in class with this guy for two weeks already. This semester is going to kill you if you let him bother you that much.” _Honestly, it’ll probably kill me first._

Kuroo lets out a frustrated exhale. “You don’t get it, Iwa-chan. If you actually met him in person--ugh.” Kuroo scrunches his nose. “You’d want to jump off a bridge. He just won’t quit when he’s clearly _wrong_.”

Iwaizumi’s been rooming with Kuroo for the second year in a row. And Iwaizumi liked rooming with Kuroo; Kuroo was a pretty chill guy. He was surprisingly neat _and_ studious AND Iwaizumi never needed to drag his ass out of some club or something every other weekend (unlike a certain someone). It was just that Kuroo decided to call him ‘Iwa-chan’ ironically after he heard Oikawa say it once to the point where it wasn’t ironic anymore. That, and the fact that every once in a while, Kuroo would let himself act like a dumbass for no good reason. The current reason being what probably was some stupid-freshman-idiot.

“Why don’t you just transfer to a different section. Today’s the last day to switch.”

Kuroo shoots him a look of horror. “I can’t let him _win_.”

Iwaizumi wonders why philosophy classes are still legal, because he remembers Oikawa plotting to kill some ‘Ushiwaka’ after taking the class. Philosophy class is probably a cover for teaching people to be murderers. If Kuroo didn’t succumb to the growing urge to kill Yaku, Iwaizumi would definitely kill Kuroo.

Iwaizumi sighs. He really needs to make new friends. Or help Kuroo kill whoever Yaku was. Then he’d get his _normal_ and _sane_ roommate back. Iwaizumi picks up his phone. 

There was only one person who would know how to handle this sort of mess.

\---

  
  


“Tooru-kun~ I called you here because we have an urgent matter to discuss.”

“You mean we’re not here to discuss the ongoing homoerotic tension between the two of us?” Oikawa’s eyes glint. “Oh, do _tell_.” Oikawa gets more comfortable in his seat.

“We have all the time in the world for us.” Suga winks. “But what we have today is a bit more time-sensitive.”

“Oh, quit teasing me already!” Oikawa pouts.

“I seem to recall that you enjoyed _all_ of Haiji’s teasing last wee--”

“Kou-chan!”

Suga grins. “Sorry, sorry. I’ll get on with it.”

The two had reserved a study room in the library as they usually did every Wednesday afternoon to discuss things completely unrelated to academics. Oikawa was stretched out in one of the plush living chairs that he’d dragged in from the lounge, and Suga was sat backwards, straddling a rolling chair.

“Morisuke has another situation.”

“Oh, the poor thing,” Oikawa says. “Which crush is he beating up now?”

“A guy in his philosophy class. From the way Mori rants about him, it sounds like it’s bad. Here, I have a pic.”

Suga pulls up a photo on his phone and shows Oikawa.

Oikawa’s eyes widen. “That’s Kuroo-chan!”

“You know him?”

“Of course! He’s Iwa-chan’s roommate. Kind of a nerd though.”

“Hmm. That makes things a lot easier,” Suga says. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Harry Potter situation** or enemies with benefits?”

“The clean up for murder would be too much,” Suga says. “And enemies with benefits wouldn’t work with Mori. No, I’m thinking of something a bit more...fun.”

Oikawa gasps. “Koushi, _no_ ! Remember when we tried to get Naruto and Sasuke together? That ended _horribly_. Such a shame too; Sasuke is _so_ hot.”

Suga shrugs. “That’s because Sasuke’s more emotionally constipated than we thought. Those two might not have worked out, but we _did_ succeed with Yuuji and Tadashi. If we can do that, we can handle this. Plus, I have a _really_ good feeling about this one.”

Oikawa thinks for a moment, then nods. “I’ll trust your instincts.”

Suga smiles. “Good.” He whips out a notepad. “Now tell me more about this Kuroo.”

\---

Yaku’s jaw drops. _No...Nonononono_. The professor declares the class over and students parade out of the classroom. All but Yaku and Kuroo, who rush to the professor’s desk.

Kuroo gets there first. “Kakashi-sensei, could you spare a moment? I want to talk about the partner essay assignments.”

Yaku finally gets to the desk, but Kakashi holds up a hand before he can speak.

“The other day, I was speaking with another sensei, and an interesting topic of conversation came up.” Kakashi looks between the two of them. “They told me that two students have been disturbing the peace in their classroom, and those two students just so happen to be in the class I have right before them. Care to take a guess as to who those two are?”

Yaku swallows. “Sensei--”

“Cooperation and teamwork, despite one another’s differences, is an important skill to have in life. We must coexist peacefully should we want a stable society--now,” Kakashi whips out an orange book with a questionable cover. “I have high expectations for your essay. The work you two have done so far in my class has been exemplary. Ah! And do make yourselves scarce. Riko-sensei is not a very patient person.” And with that, Kakashi leaves.

Kuroo and Yaku look at each other.

“Give me your number. We’ll talk about this later,” Yaku mumbles.

“Whatever.”

They hastily swap numbers. And a tense cloud surrounds the two of them as they leave.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This KuroYaku fic was also supposed to be around 800 words. But then those idiots turned around and stole my script. They friggin write themselves.  
> I refuse to force a crappy ending so I can fit in all my writing for this month marathon (I have a full-time job and all that).Therefore, I am committing a sin and starting a multi-chapter work. Forgive me! orz (to anyone who cares anyway. have you even read this far? lol)  
> 
> 
> ** The 'Harry Potter situation' refers to ‘neither can live while the other survives’
> 
> Has anyone else considered Terushima x Yamaguchi? Because I have, and I would DIE for it


End file.
